Monday, May 19, 2008

Birthing Wars: Part I


At 4 1/2 months into my pregnancy I have felt strongly impressed to switch my birthing plan and midwife. Not an ideal situation on any level. I have always planned on birthing naturally using the skills and tools of hypnobirthing, but was going to birth in a hospital because I liked my midwife. First things first. I am amazed that this is such a sensitive and
controversial topic among women. In the beginning I have shared with people I was going to birth naturally and so many were quick to shoot it down with, "Oh yea, I was planning on doing that too but there's no way..." "Good luck with that, let me know how that works out for you" OR just the "Oh..*nod* *nod*" My choice to birth natural is not an attack or judgment on anybody else's choice, it's just the beginning of many choices I will have to make as a mother that feel right to me. Really it's not a better than or best choice, it's just a different choice amongst the choices we have as women...and isn't that great we have choices?

I am also looking into birthing in a birthing center. I would consider doing a home birth, but I don't think our family is quite ready for that. I have been part of 4 home births all successful and simply have really good examples and experiences with them. When I tell people I would like to birth in a birthing center it's as though I have told them I am going to let my children play in the middle of a busy street. Hollywood has really done a number with dramatizing labor and giving us inaccurate visuals as the norm not the exception.
The bottom line is I have learned to be very selective with whom I discuss and share my thoughts with regarding this topic because rather than the conversations being one of dialogue and understanding they turn into debates, opinions and anger/fear.

I have thought through, researched and have many reasons as to why I feel it necessary to switch birthing plans halfway through my pregnancy. This choice is not based on popular or unpopular opinion for that matter, what someone else has done or is doing, or trying to make things more complicated then they need to be. My research isn't based on bias information or from the companies and/or agencies that are policitally aligned or financially invested.

Birthing a human being that on average can weigh between 6-8 lbs is a matter that for me can't be taken lightly. Nor is it merely a medical procedure. It's actually really unsettling to currently be without a midwife and navigating in unsupported, turbulent waters. But I know that all things uncomfortable cause movement to find comfort, security and a sense of peace.


aimee heff said...

Good for you! I am so happy to hear that you are doing what you want.

The birthing experience should be one that a women desires and no one should judge if you decide to be in a hospital, birthing center, or doing it at home. It is our choice and it is lovely that we have it!

Have you wanted the documentary the Business of Birthing. I see you have the picture. I haven't watched it yet but have heard from many I must.

aimee heff said...

P.S. Have fun finding a new midwife. I'm sure interviewing them should be interesting.

Jennie B. said...

As long as your doing what's right for you, that's all that matters! Why do people get so caught up in the way people give birth? Who cares!? As long as the baby and mommy are safe, it doesn't matter how the little one comes out! I know it will be an amazing experience for you and it's even better that you have a very experienced sister to help you through it. :) Sisters are the best. I'm so glad you're doing it how YOU want and not listening to what others have to say about it. You will be so happy you did!

Bridgett said...


I feel the same way ( I am due Oct. 6th) and am planning on going natural. The comments I have received have made me not even mention my plans unless someone asks, and even then I down play it because I just don't want to battle or hear all the stories.

As for your birth plan, you should do what feels right to you. You are the only one who knows what is right and no one should hinder what you want.
I first saw an OB and then I decided to switch to a midwife because I felt that is what I need.

It is pretty amazing how controversial and heated the opinions on birthing can be.

lovely lindsay said...

aware, informed, empowered - mama bird.
go with your guts {and a big chunk of your heart} when charting this course.

Kris said...
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Amanda said...

I have experience the same thing. I have always wanted to birth natural and have gotten the same reaction. "That’s just stupid... yeah right, good luck with that... blah blah blah". I still want to birth natural. There is just something about it for me. I have always admitted there is a line and a limit, but if my mom did it so can I. To be totally honest I watched my sister give birth and it scared me so bad I wouldn't let my husband touch me for months.

I have also considered birthing at a birthing center but decided not to because of my insurance incentives. Now that I have my birthing plans all set, I guess I need to work on getting pregnant:) Thanks for always helping me know I am not alone.